Uniform
(aka A Bad Case Of The Shits)
by Scab Scum

I enter a small movie theater, one that would only seat twenty or thirty people. There's four other people there; two men, sitting far apart, and two women sitting together, giggling. I take a seat, not too close to any of the others, and a loud voice comes over the loudspeakers. It sounds similar to the Wozard of Iz when he's hiding behind the curtain.

"Begin the movie!"

A room appears on the screen, dirty and empty, except for an old, wooden chair in the center of it. A young girl enters wearing a cheap uniform consisting of a brown polo shirt with yellow trim, and a black pair of slacks. Atop her flowing mess of blonde hair sits a brown cap with a yellow "T" on it. She takes a seat in the chair. There's a long close-up of her face as she stares directly into the audience. She's beautiful, the kind of girl who has a different boyfriend for every day of the week. For a moment, I imagine that pretty face between my legs, but then she holds up a large, black cockroach and my mind returns to the movie. The two females in the theater squeal.

With her delicate fingers, the beautiful ‘actress' slowly peels the hard stomach from the roach and drops the black shell on the floor. Then she raises the still squirming insect to her mouth and begins sucking its insides out.

At this point, one of the girls in the audience gets up to leave, but her friend grabs her and pulls her back into her seat. For a moment, they whisper an argument, then they continue to watch the movie.

Once empty, the roach is tossed over the starlet's shoulder. The young beauty swished the roach's insides around in her mouth, mixing them with her mucus, then spits the yellow-ish goo out into a small, rusty pale.

Sitting the pale on the floor in front of her, the girl stands and removes her cheap, black slacks. The camera closes in on her vagina. It's a horrid sight. Once pink lips were now black and yellow coated with some sort of clear slime, causing it to shine.

Both girls now get up and run for the door, and one of the men vomits on the floor. Seems they didn't do their research, as I have.

The pantless girl now spreads open her diseased lips to showcase a barrage of crusty, flaking, brown lumps. Her tiny fingers pinch, breaking off fragments of crust. A lump pops and empties out a thick, green-ish, toothpaste-like stream of spew into the pale on the ground. Then she pops another. And another. Satisfied with the amount, she then grabs the pale and exits the room. End scene one.

One of the other men in the audience chuckles, claiming that vaginal discharge scene was ‘the shit.' The one that vomited earlier seems to be unconscious.

There's another room on the screen now with a large, filthy vat on the ground. A rattling of chains is heard, then a woman is slowly lowered from the ceiling. She's chained upright to some sort of bondage contraption, her arms behind her back, her mouth taped shut and her legs spread. The captive's nude body looks bloated in some areas, her stomach a shade of blue. The camera goes in for a close-up of the area between her legs. Both the woman's vagina and anus have been sewn shut, securely, so there's no way a puff of gas could even squeeze its way out.

Back to a long shot and a young man enters wearing a similar uniform, the brown cap seemingly stuck to his greasy, nappy, long hair. He looks at the camera, smiles, then turns to the woman.

He's now clutching a large survival knife. With a quick jab, he sticks it into the woman's crotch and forcefully pulls it toward her spine, ripping her open as if gutting a deer. The hole makes way to every possible bodily fluid; shit, piss, mucus, sperm, blood, bile. The captive struggles, but not for too long. Her life drains out with her juices, as they
fill the vat on the floor.

The last man standing makes his way out of the theater, his hand firmly gripping his mouth, holding back whatever the other gentleman could not.

The gushing has now turned to a slow dripping. A couple more men in similar uniforms enter the movie. They lower the woman onto the ground, undo the chains and hoist the contraption back up, out of the picture. The dead woman's body is laid out straight across the screen, a side view from head to toe. The uniformed men walk off screen, returning with fire axes. Violently, they begin to hack up the woman's body, bits of meat and bone flying everywhere. I joke to
myself that this part would have been good in 3-D, seeing as how chunks are bouncing off the camera.

Minutes later, there's a pile on the floor that was once the woman. One of the uniformed men stuffs the remains into a trash bag and they all exit.

Then the lights come on. The movie is over. The theater doors open, and another young woman enters. She's wearing a uniform, but its slightly different. The cheap black slacks are there, but she's also wearing a white dress shirt with a black tie. Before I see how gorgeous her face is, I notice her large breasts which seem ready to burst out of her shirt.
She approaches me, smiling.

"You've made it," she says happily, congratulating me, "you're the person we're looking for. Tomorrow, you'll be allowed to practice the proper procedures for cooking on the four other applicants, and, in no time at all, you'll be an employee at Taco Barn. Come with me," she gently takes my hand, her smile turning almost sensual, "let's go pick up your uniform."

©2002 Scab Scum